


Hello

by WaitingForArthur



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Grief/Mourning, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-06
Updated: 2013-10-06
Packaged: 2017-12-28 15:36:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/993608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaitingForArthur/pseuds/WaitingForArthur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin screams Arthur's name every night. Waiting for him, but every night, Merlin is left with the echoes of his screams and his shadow.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hello

**Author's Note:**

> Inspiration from the song Echo by Jason Walker

Hello.

I’m still waiting.  Why haven’t you come back? You’re supposed to come back when Albion needs you most, but what about me?  What if I need you most, then what? 

I could stand here and scream for you, for hours, but you wouldn’t show up. I know, because I’ve tried.

I just want to hear your voice again.  The long drawl when you say my name, the soft murmurs when you draw up battle plans; I want to hear it again.  The broken words you last said to me are all I have left.  A broken goodbye.

I want a strong, solid hello.  No more goodbyes.

Alone.

I don’t want to be alone anymore, Arthur.  The world is nothing, nothing, you hear me…nothing without you.  I don’t even know what I’m doing here anymore.  I can’t die…I can’t leave, even if I wanted to, I’m bound to the Earth forever just sitting here, alone, waiting for you.

You’re taking your sweet time wherever you are, dollophead. 

Stop…stop fooling around and come back, okay, for me?  There’s no one here, Arthur, no one here for me.  I’m here for you, now I just…I just need _you_ …

I’ve screamed your name! Why don’t you listen? Why don’t you-you were always stubborn, always so…

The ground is cold where I sit waiting for you…the dew soaking through my jeans. Yes, Arthur I said jeans. They’re a new material of clothing, much more comfortable than wool.  I have a pair, just for you, they’re neatly folded in a drawer next to mine…waiting…

Maybe if I close my eyes…you’ll come back.  Maybe I’ve been dreaming and you’re still alive.  Maybe this time I can get you to Avalon.  This time I can save you.

But when I open my eyes…you’re not there.  You’re never there.

Echo.

All I hear is my voice…my shattered, desperate voice resonating back to me, screaming in the middle of the night, screaming your name.  Your name is just an echo, lost in the chill, lost in time.

Shadow.

Mine’s the only one.

I chuckle all the time, but do you remember that one time, you probably won’t, it’s so long ago, but that one time I saw our shadows?  They were together on the wall and I was spooked because, well, you remember…don’t you?

Listen.

When my throat is raw from screaming and my lungs ache from effort, I listen.  I wait.  I listen for an answer. I wait for you to say my name, wondering, could it really be?

I can just imagine it. One of these nights, I’ll call for you, and you’ll answer.  You’ll call back, questioning and I’ll confirm it and then you’ll scream my name just like I’ve been screaming yours.  When your voice cracks it won’t be because you’re dying, leaving me, it’ll be because you’re alive, coming back to me.

So I wait…and I listen, but dammit Arthur, you don’t respond.  You never respond.

Arthur, I’m going mad.  I need you.  This isn’t funny anymore.  The prophecy says you come back.  What more does the world want? People are starving, dying, there’s war and greed and we’ve had civil wars, world wars, unnecessary wars and you didn’t come back. Why, why didn’t you come back?  What do I have to do to get you to come back?  Unleash the power of my magic on the world; destroy half the planet, and then will you come back?

I don’t care if you would have to kill me…if you would have to punish me for what I did to get you back! I just want you again…here with me.

That’s stupid. There’s gotta be another way.

So I yell for you...again.  Every night until I can’t speak, until the tears drench my face, and the beating of my heart is so loud, so intense that I fall to my knees.

I’m alone Arthur. Don’t you care? Do you think about me at all?  Do you scream for me too as you watch me sink to my knees in defeat every night?

Do you miss our banter?  How I knew what to say every time just to get you to smile or laugh and forget that you were King, even if it was only for a second.

Do you miss my support? How I would sit with you, late into the night, writing speeches, making battle plans.

Do you miss me? Because I miss you.

I want to feel again Arthur.  I want to feel your strong arms, your broad shoulders, and your golden hair. 

I want to feel you here, next to me, laughing, crying, and talking to me.

I’m done shouting. I’m done yelling for you.  I’m done waiting. 

You need to come back right now or else…or else I’m leaving and never coming back again…

You know, I actually started walking away…I took a few steps, looked back, waited for you to order me to stay or throw silver at me…and then I kept walking.

I got so far.  I got back to my apartment, back to normal life.  I started forgetting about you and living…

Well, you know me, Arthur…I could never leave you.

That’s why I’m sitting here, wiping away the tears, and talking to you, because maybe you needed to know why I keep coming back.  Maybe just yelling your name wasn’t enough.  I should’ve known better than that.  You need a full explanation, not just one word. 

See, I haven’t seen you in so long that I almost forgot something about you, but I remembered…like I always do.

I clear my throat, close my eyes and with my heart pounding and the tears silently falling, I say hopefully…

Hello.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to mysteriousasthedarkside and Fandom-Fox for their approval!! :D


End file.
